我覺得，在說我的故事之前，一定要先說一下我爸媽的故事。                                                                                                             我老媽，據(jù)說當(dāng)年十里八鄉(xiāng)一朵花，等到花朵含ba0待放的時候，那上門的人只差沒有踏斷外公家的門檻。                                                                                                             這一點因為多少帶了點歷史遺留x問題存在，再加上看了母上那么多年閃耀在yan光下的三層肚的光輝形象，我覺得，有待考證。                                                                                                             我老爸是一個特別老實巴交的人，這一點在老媽偶爾提起當(dāng)年的時候，就能夠得出結(jié)論。                                                                                                             老爸是晚婚晚育的一族，娶我家老娘的時候已經(jīng)臨近三十，在那個早婚的年代，大概是屬于異類，而原因無他，家徒四壁。                                                                                                             所以當(dāng)老爸向外公提親的時候，我那參過軍在部隊學(xué)了一身好醫(yī)術(shù)，退伍之后又光榮地參與了服務(wù)社會這項重任一向作風(fēng)嚴(yán)謹?shù)耐夤珕柪习?，為什么想要娶他的nv兒的時候，老爸很白目但是又很誠實地回答了。                                                                                                             “因為家里窮。”                                                                                                             =0=                                                                                                             我想，當(dāng)時我外公還有老媽一定是滿頭黑線加一個囧臉狀的，甚至我都能夠想象外公的心理一定很抓狂。                                                                                                             什么叫做因為家里窮，難道就是因為家里窮才想到要娶我家的nv兒嗎？                                                                                                             我很肯定，聽到老爸這個回答的外公一定這樣想過。                                                                                                             雖然老爸的回答實在是有點缺心眼，但是并不妨礙老媽對老爸一見鐘情，再見j*情，三見私奔的命運。                                                                                                             我也曾問過老媽，當(dāng)年為什么就會挑中老爸這一g木頭時，老娘無限感慨。                                                                                                             “我當(dāng)時就想，要是我不嫁給你爸，那么缺心眼又笨的人一定要打一輩子光棍！”                                                                                                             嘿，我那個時候特別詫異，我老娘居然還是一個圣母級別的人物，難怪當(dāng)年肯嫁給一個b自己大了八歲家里只有遮頭瓦的老爸，要知道現(xiàn)在的漂亮nv人只想要魚躍豪門。                                                                                                             因為這一句話，老媽的形象在我的心目中已經(jīng)從河?xùn)|獅上升了好幾個段位。                                                                                                             但是下一秒的，她又成功地摧毀了我的崇拜。                                                                                                             “還有，你爸長的挺好看的！”                                                                                                             膚淺！                                                                                                             我滿心滿眼的崇拜，一下子成了鄙夷，我老娘居然是那么膚淺的生物，實在太讓人難以置信了。                                                                                                             但是我直到后來情竇初開，喜歡上了那號稱是校草的同桌伊杰的時候，恍然頓悟了——在身上留了一半老媽血y的我，骨子里面其實也挺膚淺的。                                                                                                             好吧，雖然說我老媽b較膚淺，但是如果不是她跟著我爸，也不會有了現(xiàn)在的我。                                                                                                             我表示能理解她的膚淺。                                                                                                             老爸g過很多份工作，從小販到包工頭，從工廠工人到最后塵埃落地在一家自營業(yè)的小飯館，經(jīng)歷了很多的老爸確定自己因為不夠心黑，成不了j商一流，所以直到現(xiàn)在他覺得這一生最大的成就是娶了當(dāng)年貌美如花的老娘還有生了一個我，守著一家小飯館一路供著我上了大學(xué)。                                                                                                             后來聽老媽說，當(dāng)年老爸在當(dāng)包工頭的時候，有過一個開服裝店的有錢nv老板看上了他，那種癡心真真叫人噓吁，而那個時候的老爸已經(jīng)臨近四十不惑的年齡，而那個nv老板b我媽還小了三歲。                                                                                                             面對這樣的美se*誘惑，我老爸不為所動，很專注地對著我媽一個，哪怕我媽從一朵嬌yan的鮮花轉(zhuǎn)變成了現(xiàn)在的霸王花，他都沒有表現(xiàn)出一絲厭煩。                                                                                                             少年夫妻老來伴，我爸的骨子里面流淌著名叫長情的物質(zhì)。                                                                                                             所以當(dāng)三年的暗戀不但不敢開口還癡心不移，到畢業(yè)的那一天好不容易萌生了把他堵在暗巷里面然后進行告白這個念頭的時候，卻眼看著伊杰和?；◤奈疑磉叾^，我還傻b一樣地說“挺好的，很般配”這樣的臺詞的時候，我覺得遺傳到了我爸的基因也是一種可悲的事情。                                                                                                             所以綜合了我爸媽的優(yōu)缺點，我凌墨注定是一個膚淺卻又長情的家伙。                                                                                                             而我的故事開端，大概是從……                                                                                                             “用你那一手無法掌握的三十三f，夾si他！”                                                                                                             這一句話開始的……o(╯□╰)o